God is always listening.

so.  i’m sitting here.  strugglin w this big writing that i have to do.  strugglin to get started.  i have read enough to write the whole of at least 15 pages, but i haven’t put a word into the computer.  battlin’, self sabotagin, you know how i do.

so just now,  i was finally going to get cracking.  and took another second to send out acts of faith for today and yesterday coz i hadn’t done it.  and the line from yesterday’s act of faith was: i can do it because i believe i can do it.  and so i said it outloud, empathetically, and loudly.

and then this is the message that i get from a friend on gchat: i like your attitude!

keep in mind.  i haven’t talked w this guy in probably… three years.  i met him briefly, once when i was in taiwan.  and he’s left me gchat messages, maybe 4 or 5 times over that time, but we haven’t really talked.  and i’m guessing, he was-in his mind-responding to my gchat message which is: YOU ARE BRILLIANT, AND THE EARTH IS HIRING. The earth couldn’t afford to send any recruiters or limos to your school. It sent you rain, sunsets, ripe cherries, night blooming jasmine, and that unbelievably cute person you are dating. Take the hint. And here’s the deal: Forget that this task of planet-saving is not possible in the time required. Don’t be put off by people who know what is not possible. Do what needs to be done, and check to see if it was impossible only after you are done. ~Paul Hawken http://www.dailygood.org/more.php?n=3697 (commencement speech in portland, totally worth reading)

but in fact, i had only a second ago-literally-said to myself: i can do it because i believe i can do it!

and it was affirmed.    never know where blessings come from!

thank God for that.

—-

these are the responses i recieved from the people that nurture and hold me:

“my mom calls these moments godwinks.  god winked atcha
now get crackin’ “

“Firstly I love the idea of you sitting and saying it outloud.  I have done that once or twice and am surprised at how much more willing I am to hold myself accountable to what I say, when I say it outloud.  Good for you!!Secondly, that guy’s response?  There are no coincidences in life.  I think Einstein said that coincidences are just God’s way of remaining anonymous.  Looks like God’s at it again “

“you can do it!  i affirm you! mwah!”

“I find that the more I embrace my fears and prejudices with the intent and desire to let them go and cleave the possible ( and all is possible in the plans of the Divine) than I find myself at peace, empowered to be who I am to be in my planetary role as me. I do try to remember that my role is to seek with the intent to do good and to do no harm in all my actions and thought. The outcome is not for me to decide”

goodness!  good.